Judas Waiting
by Liem
Summary: [LxLight] L and Yagami Light. Fifty sentences about the eccentric genius, brilliant prodigy, and those cat and mouse games they love ohsomuch.


**#1—Motion**

Kira has struck again, the T.V. blares into the darkened room, and punished another criminal; from his seat in the chair, L decides it's time to make his own move.

**#2—Cool**

Kira is only one person; Kira lives in Japan; Kira is a student; it is a logical progression of thoughts, a path that L knows will bring him straight to Kira—whether he will live or die in the confrontation is a concern he files away in the back of his mind.

**#3—Young**

Kira (God, savior, executioner)—is he really this boy, this high school student with such open, charming manners?

**#4—Last **

L's real name will not be the last one to be written in the Death Note; but Light knows that as soon as he writes it, it's all downhill from there: easy going until he becomes god of the new world.

**#5—Wrong**

He is a new god, he is their savior-executioner, he is _Kira_; what he does is for their good—he is infallible.

**#6—Gentle**

"It's not an easy way to die," L says, and Light thinks, _Do criminals deserve any better? _(does L?).

**#7—One**

Light has never before met someone who is his match, his equal in intellect, and he enjoys the challenge; but the sacrifice of one person is necessary for the good of all, and maybe there will be another (he doesn't hold his breath for it).

**#8—Thousand**

The count of criminals dead grows; it is frustrating to be so close, to _know_ but have no proof, and L bites his thumb harder when he thinks of the thousands already put on death row by Kira.

**#9—King**

He will rule this new world, and he knows he will need Misa, with her shinagami eyes, at his side; briefly, he wonders if L would make a better consort, but he knows that L would never submit to be second to anyone.

**#10—Learn**

L's real name (his identity, the key to his death): Light wishes he could just rip it out of him, sometimes—what _is_ it?

**#11—Blur**

It happens so quickly: heated skin, the _clank_ of metal, and suddenly L finds himself entangled with Light, connected by more than the slick chain slithering between them.

**#12—Wait**

Creeping heat, enveloping, slow burn; it is constant, a game going on, but L knows that soon it will all end in a final burst of flames.

**#13—Change**

Theirs is not a roses and chocolate romance; it is a game of cat and mouse where they continuously circle each other, and nothing will change until one of them wins.

**#14—Command**

"Will you let me?" Light hisses, biting into his earlobe, and L pushes the younger boy up against the wall, because L allows no one to command him.

**#15—Hold**

"Hold this," L murmurs to Light, holding out a cone of dripping ice cream, and pops his fingers inside his mouth and sucks off the sticky sweetness as Light watches, body tense.

**#16—Need**

Misa tries to find herself in Light, a meaning to her life; but L, ever analytical, knows that you cannot possibly find a piece of yourself in another person—and besides that, it is a rather dangerous advantage to hand away.

**#17—Vision**

Once, Light catches L rubbing tiredly at his eyes, and makes the surprising discovery that L wears contacts; "Late nights in front of a computer screen have their price, Light-kun."

**#18—Attention**

"Kira is nothing but a spoiled brat who thinks he can rule the world through terror," L says, and Light grits his teeth, because what does L know of the sacrifices he has been forced to make?

**#19—Soul**

Where will L's soul (provided there is even such a thing) go once he is dead, Light wonders, and will Light's be able to find his in the afterlife?

**#20—Picture**

"No photos of your parents?" Matsuda once asks, and Light thinks, _Nobody to mourn or cry over you?_; a part of him almost twinges in empathy, but the string to that note was snapped long ago.

**#21—Fool**

Misa likes to pretend that she doesn't see the subtle glances, or feel the heat and tension whenever Light and L are in the same room.

**#22—Mad**

Light has never seen L angry; L has never seen Light as anything other than calm and rational; of course, they know that that means nothing.

**#23—Child**

Was L ever a child, Matsuda foolishly asks once, and for answer, L sweeps an arm over the table crammed with teeth-rotting junk; and somehow, Light has no trouble imagining a mini L, situated in front of a glowing screen twice his size.

**#24—Now**

For now, they are friends: Yagami Light, handsome prodigy, and Ryuuzaki, eccentric genius.

**#25—Shadow**

Everybody will worship Kira one day as God; and nobody will remember L except, maybe, Kira himself.

**#26—Goodbye**

L does not believe in goodbyes; sooner or later, people will meet again, because everybody pays their dues, in this life or the next.

**#27—Hide**

Nobody can hide from Kira except L, who is infuriatingly right _there_, right under Light's nose.

**#28—Fortune**

This isn't about luck; this is about planning, about staying one step ahead, a chess game that they play, keeping a careful eye on each other across the board.

**#29—Safe**

L never feels more in danger than when he is lying in bed next to a peacefully slumbering Light; for all he knows, Light could be dreaming up ways to kill him, perhaps when he is most distracted, staring at the softened curves of the boy's face.

**#30—Ghost**

Light does not believe that L's ghost will haunt him; after all, ghosts are a sign of regret.

**#31—Book**

"What are you thinking about?" Light murmurs one time, and L, looking at the guileless face lying next to him, almost answers, before he remembers the shining chain crumpled between them; the reply, "I'm thinking about you, you not as Kira," dies away.

**#32—Eye**

"Kira believes in an eye for an eye," Light says, and L counters with, "I would think that someone who has discovered such an ingenious way to kill others would be advanced far past such an out-dated concept."

**#33—Never**

"Never," to L, is a finite and infinitely more realistic word that "forever" when it comes to Light; never say anything about the sex, never give an inch, never betray an advantage, never look back.

**#34—Sing**

"I'm a big fan of Misa-Misa," L pretends to enthuse, and Light plays along, a dutiful if exasperated boyfriend; they both know it is only an act, because since when does L listen to pop music, or Light really devote himself to anything but an ideal?

**#35—Sudden**

Is it a surprise, L muses, to suddenly die, no warning, and will he be ready when his time comes?

**#36—Stop**

"Light-kun seems very eager," L murmurs, and Light resists the urge to punch the detective: he can't help being a teenager, and anyway it's too late to stop, chain already clanking furiously in time with his hand.

**#37—Time** (movieverse)

Light checks his watch, counting down the seconds; L keeps time in his head silently, aware of the synchronization of their thoughts.

**#38—Wash**

"And how, exactly, are we going to take showers like this?"; "Why, Light-kun, it's very simple: we take showers together, of course…Light-kun, are you blushing?"

**#39—Torn**

Light-kun is his friend, it is true; but Light-kun is also almost certainly Kira, and L knows that these are two equally dangerous things.

**#40—History**

Will L be remembered as a hero who stood against the tyrant Kira, or as a foolish dissident, crushed by God?; to Light, he will always be L, supremely intelligent, annoying, eccentric, and ultimately more than just a shadowy figure of history.

**#41—Power**

Power corrupts the weak, and eventually destroys even the ones who can wield it for good; Light had never considered the latter possibility.

**#42—Bother**

From the moment he fooled Light on public television, L became more than a mere annoyance; he never let himself be anything less than a full-blown problem, right up until his death.

**#43—God**

It is a game of cat and mouse, but who is the cat and who is the mouse?

**#44—Wall**

There is no such thing as a dead end, only a wall that can either be got around or blown apart; Light, it is turning out, will need a _lot _of dynamite to deal with L.

**#45—Naked**

Light traces the ridges of L's spine, and presses himself up against the older man; but L jerks away and begins dressing, and when he shuffles back to the bed, he has the key—Light sighs, and holds out his wrist obediently: there is never any intimacy here.

**#46—Drive **(movieverse)

Twenty-two days, he decides; he supposes it's enough time to get everything in order, but not enough to begin to regret what he has chosen to do.

**#47—Harm**

It is almost bittersweet when L dies in Light's arms, if not for the triumphant gleam in the latter's eyes; the only thing Light actually regrets is never finding out L's real name, but even that seems too personal, too close.

**#48—Precious**

Near, Light thinks, is not half what L was, and he doesn't know why he feels so angry about it.

**#49—Hunger**

He tried to save the world, he really did, and this is how he is repaid; he deserves better than a death like a criminal's (did L?).

**#50—Believe**

There is no heaven or hell for those who use the Death Note; he spends his eternity in a dry wasteland, dust in his eyes, an unknown name at the tip of his tongue.


End file.
